si CANTIK dan si BISU

Hey guys...rasanya dah lama sangat aku tak hapdate entry pasal cintan-cintun, entry bersifat eww ewww geli kan. so hari ni sebelum aku tido petang tadi aku terfikir nak buat entry ni...actually dah lama nak buat. cuma takde idea mencurah bagai susu krimer pekat manis yang dituang dalam teh tarik..perghh sedap! Eh..

Kali ni aku nak cerita pasal situasi yang baru2 ni aku alami, aku perhati dan aku terfikir..apakah itu?

SITUASI 1
Pada suatu hari sedang aku dating kat salah sebuah mall ni, tiba2 aku rasa lapar. So aku decide nak pegi mekdi, makan big mac! dah siap order semua aku tunggu la staff tu siapkan apa aku order. Then kat sebelah kanan aku ternampak sepasang couple pun duk tengah order. Dalam masa aku perati tu aku perasan yang si boy asyik tengok menu tanpa berkata apa2 kat girlnya. Seketika kemudian tiba2 dia keluarkan "hand sign" tunjuk kat girl tu. I assume dia nak bagitau apa yang dia nak. Then baru aku sedar yang rupanya boy tu bisu.

SITUASI 2
Kali ni agak kebetulan aku tengah jalan2 kat mall yang sama dalam situasi 1 tadi. Tapi aku bukan kat mekdi. Dekat dengan elevator tu ada mesin penimbang berat. So aku pun agak teringin la nak tau berapa berat aku walaupun tau yang berat aku takkan cecah angka yang aku nak. Then aku perasan yang mesin tu berkarat ya rabbi...tak jadi den! Dalam duk usha2 mesin tu aku nampak la couple ni..Sekali lagi aku pelik tengok cara diorang berkomunikasi. Si boy bagi "hand sign" kat si girl. Tapi si girl tetap mengeluarkan suara (sebab aku dengar dia cakap). Si boy tengok girl dan bagi respon dengan "hand sign" jugak.

So then untuk kedua kalinya aku terserampak dengan couple yang merupakan "si cantik dan si bisu" atau "the beauty and the mute" dalam konteks yang agak comel bagi aku. Aku tak sure yang couple yang aku nampak tu adalah couple yang sama ataupun couple berbeza. Pardon my memory..banyak sangat fikir punya pasal sampai lupa banyak benda.

Point is aku rasa couple yang macam aku story kat atas sangat jarang kita tengok. Jarang kita akan jumpa sorang yang normal memiliki partner yang kurang upaya. right?
Aku respect girl tu sebab sentiasa ada dengan boy tu. I bet it's not easy for her.

Whatever it is, how many times can we see the kind of situation I mentioned above? Luckily for me though I get to see it twice and I find it "sweet".
If by any chance that I have somebody like that guy, i'll be happy to be the "voice". It's nice to feel needed. It makes us feel loved. I'm not asking for it to happen though, I'm just saying IF I happen to be dealing with someone like that guy, I would be happy.. I guess.

I know I'm a TROUBLE

Sometimes I think that I'm just a trouble for everybody around me. I'm just a guy who's holding other people back, the one who's slowing everybody down, the one who's affecting people's decision to think about me first before thinking about what's good for them. Makes me wonder why I even exist in the first place. If I am just gonna give an endless series of troubles to people, why don't I just gone? It's not fun wahtching other people get into trouble because of me, and I'm not doing whatsoever to pay them back. I feel really useless and helpless.



I'm sorry. :')

Rainy night spill out

It's getting harder and harder each day for me. All I have to hold on is my spirit to survive, little it may be, I have to believe and depend on it. Just when I thought that things are getting better, actually they are still not that good. People say, life is about making choices, easy of hard ones, it doesn't matter. When we're young, we make trivial decisions like wanting for toys from our parents, asking them to take us to places and many more, but the elders just think that we're asking for silly things and they just ignore us, while we think what we're asking is like the most important thing, and nobody cared. So we sulk!

But those are childhood days. Now that I'm older, it feels like everytime I'm making decision, people are getting affected. There are people that are not happy with the decision I made. Back then when I was little, what I decide is for myself. Yes it's selfish, but I know what I want best for myself. Now, some decisions that I made, I'm not sure about it myself. Sometimes I feel like I made decisions just to please everyone else around me. To make sure that they're happy with my choice, well not for my happiness clearly.
But I know that I have to be stronger each day. The decisions I made, the consequences are on me. I bare with it alone and nobody will care how much I pain I'm having. Sometimes I do think that people thinking negative about me can be made into motivation. To always make me down to earth and know where I stand, so that I don't stray from who I am.

As for you guys out there, nobody in this world will be as easy as we've ever imagined, and not everything will go according to our plans. We have to be ready for any possibilities, and make backup plans just in case things are falling apart. One thing that we always have to remember is to make wise decisions in our life.

Love Note

Sometimes songs undertand us better than anybody else. Whenever I lay in bed at night and just thinking about whatever comes to mind, I always end up listening to songs that can calm me down. I just found a song from Chase Coy titled Love Note and the lyrics just hit me.

"Sometimes I think I need to get away,
Pack all my things,
Get on a plane,
Head off alone one summer day,
Never look back at the town i called home,
Maybe visit california,
I hear its nice there in the summer,
But all the waves and coastline and sunset shores would just make me miss you more."

Good night!

Wordless Sunday